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Have you ever asked your best friend, can you keep a secret? We all have secrets—a new relationship, clothing that we buy, or a surprise birthday party—that we only share with close friends.

However, there are some secrets that we don’t share with anyone because they are too embarrassing.

There are secrets in our lives that only God sees.

In Romans 2:16 we read, “In the day when God shall judge the secrets of men by Jesus Christ according to my gospel.”

The secrets that we don’t want anyone to know about are life-controlling issues and come into three categories: emotional, physical, and relationships. If we don’t deal with them now, they will cripple us from living free.

Life Controlling Problems keep us from experiencing the beautiful plans God has for our lives. We all have them, even Christians. In some of the life-controlling problems, we need our broken hearts to be healed. In others, we need change in our lives (before they rob, destroy and kill us). The good news is that Jesus said, “If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed” (John 8:36). 

Step 1: Acknowledge Your Life Controlling Issues

The following is a list of Life Controlling Problems. Discover what Life Controlling problems you need healing in your heart for, and which ones you need to change in your life.

• Lack of desire to work, working long hours, or work is more important than God or family

• Ministry is more important than God or family

• Sports are more important than God or family

• Drugs, alcohol, gambling, or smoking

• Sexual desires, such as porn, adultery, sex outside of marriage, or homosexuality

• Trying to fix the problems of others, codependency, or enabling others with their life controlling problems

• Grief due to divorce or the death of a loved one

• Depression, fear, anger, or unforgiveness

• Worry, loneliness, or rejection

• Seeking the approval of others, insecurities, criticizing others, or feeling neglected

• Prejudice and hate

• Domestic abuse, including emotional, physical and sexual (this also includes rape)

• Eating too much food, not eating enough, or eating things that are harmful

• Shopping, internet use, video games (if a great deal of time is spent on it and prevents you from spending time with God and family)

Step 2: Acknowledge Your Need for God

There are times that we are hurt by what others have done or said to us. If we are honest with ourselves, we know that we have at times disobeyed God and even hurt others by what we have said or done. The Bible reads: “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). That is why we shouldn’t put others down—we too have sinned.

Once we have admitted that we have sinned, we need to repent of our sins. Repentance is to have a change of heart. It means to turn from our sinful lifestyles and to begin to obey God. 2 Chronicles 7:14 says “If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”

Because we have sinned, we all need a savior. We are not saved by works, church, denominations, or rituals. We are saved by faith alone in what Jesus did on the cross. “For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast” (Ephesians 2:8-9).

Believe that Jesus died for your sins. “God commendeth His love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Romans 5:8).

Confess Jesus as both Lord and Savior. “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved” (Romans 10:9).

If you want to receive Jesus as your Lord and Savior, all you need to do is invite Him into your life. You can do that by praying a prayer similar to the following:

Dear Jesus I believe you died on the cross for my sins and rose again from the dead. Forgive me for all that I have done, come live inside of me by your Holy Spirit. Please heal my broken heart and help me overcome my life controlling problems. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Step 3: Grow Your Faith

The following 4 steps are not needed to go to Heaven, because we are not saved by works. However, they will help us to grow in our faith and help us overcome life controlling issues.

Pray: “Be careful for nothing; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God” (Philippians 4:6). Prayer is talking to God. When you pray, ask God to help you with your life controlling problems. Remember, we all have them. 

Read the Bible: “All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness” (2 Timothy 3:16). The Bible will teach us, guide us, and correct us (when needed). The Bible will give us the answers we need to live right with God. 

Attend a Bible believing church: “Not forsaking the assembling of ourselves together, as the manner of some is; but exhorting one another: and so much the more, as ye see the day approaching” (Hebrews 10:25). Church is where we can worship with and learn from other Christians. We will also hear sermons that we can apply to our everyday lives. You can visit the church listed at the end of this pamphlet.

Attend a Christian support group: “Now we exhort you, brethren, warn them that are unruly, comfort the feebleminded, support the weak, be patient toward all men” (1 Thessalonians 5:14). God does not want us to judge or condemn anyone. He wants us to be patient with each other’s shortcomings. We are to encourage each other to lift them up (when they fall into temptations, and help them heal from their hurts).

- Written by Rev. John A Harrison

You can find a support group through:

YOUR CHURCH NAME HERE
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